4/100 done on 30.08.08
sungmin tries to mend his & hankyung's broken hearts up on the rooftops.
THIS IS CRAP. BUT. IDK. I JUST NEEDED TO WRITE SOMETHING, GUHH.
& I listened to Lostprophets' Rooftops while writing this :D
"So this is where you always come to."
Hankyung blinks, turning his head just so slightly to see the newcomer, then smiles slightly--he doesn't know he can still smile now--before staring back up at the blood-red sky inked with brilliant shades of pink, purple and gold.
"Yeah, well...it's too nice out," he says. Sungmin walks towards him, standing by his side and following his gaze.
"I know, isn't it?" the younger man murmurs. Hankyung doesn't have to wait for his next few words for his mood to plunge lower into the ebbs of cold reality. "It's nice that the weather is being the opposite of how you and I feel."
Hankyung chuckles humourlessly and they watch the sun slowly dipping lower down the horizon.
Quietly both of them let scenes from before flash before their eyes again. Heechul screaming. Kyuhyun yelling. Heechul's forceful hand gestures that could practically land a person in hospital if they were in close proximity. Kyuhyun's dark glare cutting right through your soul just by those black orbs focusing on you.
Heechul and Kyuhyun were the most unlikely pair to quarrel, but sadly they were, and their quarrels never usually ended very pleasantly either. Heechul disliked Kyuhyun's sharp wit that rivalled his own narcissistic sarcasm, and Kyuhyun didn't have patience for the haughty 'princess' of Super Junior, even if Heechul was years older than him. Both refused to back down, and this similar trait that they shared was the cause of everyone else becoming affected by their petty arguments. Hankyung and Sungmin had it the hardest though--their relationships with Heechul and Kyuhyun respectively were always strained as the two found it hard to put aside their confrontations so easily. Hankyung hated how touchy and moody Heechul became after a fight with Kyuhyun, and Sungmin would be upset by Kyuhyun's irritable disposition.
If they disliked each other so much, how did they end up--
It's too hard.
Hankyung's eyes follow the glowing trail of the sun setting, determined to concentrate on this wondrous beauty and put aside anything else. Even so, quite unwillingly, his mind wonders if he's ever going to be okay ever again.
Sungmin's smile is bitter even though the beauty of the sunset awed him, and with a pang he realizes that he never does make an effort to watch Nature's miracles taking place, and is glad to be up on the rooftops although heights are unnerving for him. He finds himself thinking if he can become his old sunshiny self.
The thought of Kyuhyun holding Heechul in his arms and not Sungmin makes him shudder.
"Why?" he sighs, not caring that he's speaking aloud. "Why them?"
He is too tired now to cry any more, he is too tired to think about them, he is too tired to care about his broken heart, he is too tired to even feel alive.
Hankyung's arms are around him a moment later, and Sungmin leans his head against the older man's chest, his eyes drooping. He wants to sleep, it's been ages since he really slept, and Hankyung feels so comfortable right now, maybe because the other feels the same way as he does since it affects him the same way.
"I know," Hankyung's voice is a mere whisper in the cool night air.
It is impossible that both of them can't feel the pain anymore, maybe they're too hurt to feel anything, too numb. Whatever it is, Sungmin doesn't feel wrong when he lifts his head up and clumsily finds Hankyung's lips with his own, he doesn't feel wrong when Hankyung kisses him back softly, almost resignedly.
Sungmin doesn't say anything or feel anything when Hankyung abruptly pulls away, murmuring, "No, we can't, Sungmin...we're not them, we just...can't." He just stares over Hankyung's shoulder and whispers, "Oh."
The thing is, Hankyung isn't Kyuhyun. And Sungmin sure as hell isn't Heechul.
It's too hard to deal anymore.
I think I pretty much rock at angst. O.O
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